"Love Yourself"

We've all heard the following statements over and over and over again. . .

That's nice and all, but what no one talks about or teaches you is HOW to love yourself. What does that mean?? I use to think it was spa days, pedicures, and saying "no" -- ya know, putting yourself first. It always sounded over indulgent and selfish. Over the last few years I have been trying (sometimes desperately) to define and then live from a space of loving myself. It has not been easy. There is a reason the word "practice" often follows the word spiritual.

What I think* I have learned:

1. Loving Yourself is more about what you feed your head than anything else. If you really listen to yourself talk is it kind? To you? To others?
I found my internal "voice" was obnoxious! I wouldn't want to hang around with me. Ewwwww. The noise was incessant. Constantly whining about the situation, about others. I dare you to listen, really listen. What do you tell yourself all day?
I am fairly certain that beating yourself up for something you did, didn't do, said, didn't say, heard, want to hear but haven't, etc. . .  ALL OF IT is the opposite of Loving Yourself.

2. Loving Yourself is about looking at every single decision you make ALL day long! From the food you choose, drink you swallow, teeth you floss (or don't), the exercise you do, the conversations you have. . .  ALL OF IT MATTERS!
Collectively these actions either say I care about myself enough to make the simple and tough decisions or I don't. The loving decisions are often based on longer term rewards than instant gratification. BEWARE: The "I deserve this ________" (fill in the blank - drink, ice cream, pizza, etc..) is about to lose its power and may be replaced with "I deserve to be healthy and the good news is I have the power to make that happen." NOTE: Truth is not only can you -- only you can!

3. We have an unlimited amount of opportunity to get it right -- day after day, minute by minute.
So, when you screw up, don't dwell on it. Let it go. Move on. You have a fresh opportunity right NOW to Love Yourself. (See #1 for reason to let it go.)

*Truth is I am not 100% sure of anything. I tend to try things on and then test them. They either fit or they don't. If they don't I discard. If they ring true after testing I usually enlist a few friends to test them too and report back. Feel free to report back by commenting in this blog  post.